[ Ah. It's his turn to go silent, allowing the weight of Essek's words to sit heavy atop his chest. It's hard to put into words just how much he can't get used to the idea of relying on someone else. Even to this day, he's frightened at the chance of Nehan growing tired of him, of losing one more person that he loves. To think that another person has been added to that circle of concern. ]
But... you have done something better. I've told you before that you've made this place bearable for me. I look forward to spending time with you and to our conversations, whether they're silly or serious.
To be honest with you, Essek, I don't know what it is that friends do either. I'm trying to learn as well. Back in my cosmos, my eyes and this brand on my neck are enough to keep people away from me. It's really only when I'm in a place like this that I'm treated... normally. It's still something that I'm getting used to, and I guess... I guess I just don't know how to lower my guard.
[Both of them need to be killed. After a moment, the water bottle clatters to the ground, and he raises his arms to loop them around Aventurine's back, squeezing the shit out of him.
Die.]
You could have stayed in the room with me if you weren't sleeping well. You could have always found me if you were anxious. I didn't even-- I knew you weren't telling me things. I should have pushed you harder to stop being an idiot.
[As if he didn't have the highest fucking guard for a century.]
But I didn't want you to pull even more away, especially after...
[WELL! THINGS! He's sure Aventurine might pull back after the crush debacle. Stupid. It's all stupid!!]
But there goes their one water bottle. It's probably rolling down the trail now. ]
Pull away?
[ He laughs at that, but there's nothing mocking about the sound. It's more relief than anything else that Essek is finally reciprocating the hug, and all at once, the crushing weight against his chest disappears. He hasn't lost his friend. ]
You're not getting rid of me that easily. Not after all the trouble you put me through to get you to even like me in the first place.
He makes a disgruntled sort of muttering and grumbling noise under his breath at that. Okay, LOOK. Good thing Aventurine won't ever know he kissed him when he was asleep. Somnophilia kink... (no)]
If that's the case, then do your part, you giant idiot. If you can talk to anyone, it ought to be Nehan, then me. And since Nehan isn't here, you're left with me. Lucky you.
Are you still having trouble sleeping and breathing? Why did you even pick this place then!
[ It's okay if Essek has a somno kink. There are so many other things wrong with him. ]
Can't stand me? I just thought a nice walk would do some good for the both of us. If I had known we'd be having this talk in the middle of it, I would have picked somewhere else!
[ At least it's easy to fall back into old habits with Essek. Like arguing. ]
... And my breathing is fine. It's just sleep that escapes me. I take naps here and there, but I haven't had a restful night's sleep in a while.
[He makes an exasperated noise with the vibe of CHRIST!! but he isn't from Earth to know that exclamation.
He leans back and puts his hands on Aventurine's arms instead. In case he needs to shake the shit out of Aventurine probably.]
Would you stop that? Do you want to stay somewhere together so you can get some sleep? You can't think you exist when it has been almost eight weeks, and you haven't been sleeping. This is why you're insane.
Anyway, they pull away from their hug, and Aventurine gawks at Essek. ]
I think my efforts for getting this far should be commended at least a little bit more than that. [ No, they should not. ] But I don't know. Maybe. I did see there was a motel setup.
[DON'T GET DISTRACTED. Also, don't gawk, you stupid idiot.][If you want friends, you will realize they will tell you the hard truths when you don't want them to do it.]
Alright, it's done then.
[HE DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO NEGOTIATE, HE JUST IMMEDIATELY ASSIGNED AVENTURINE IN A ROOM WITH HIM SO HE CAN SLEEP.]
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But... you have done something better. I've told you before that you've made this place bearable for me. I look forward to spending time with you and to our conversations, whether they're silly or serious.
To be honest with you, Essek, I don't know what it is that friends do either. I'm trying to learn as well. Back in my cosmos, my eyes and this brand on my neck are enough to keep people away from me. It's really only when I'm in a place like this that I'm treated... normally. It's still something that I'm getting used to, and I guess... I guess I just don't know how to lower my guard.
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Die.]
You could have stayed in the room with me if you weren't sleeping well. You could have always found me if you were anxious. I didn't even-- I knew you weren't telling me things. I should have pushed you harder to stop being an idiot.
[As if he didn't have the highest fucking guard for a century.]
But I didn't want you to pull even more away, especially after...
[WELL! THINGS! He's sure Aventurine might pull back after the crush debacle. Stupid. It's all stupid!!]
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But there goes their one water bottle. It's probably rolling down the trail now. ]
Pull away?
[ He laughs at that, but there's nothing mocking about the sound. It's more relief than anything else that Essek is finally reciprocating the hug, and all at once, the crushing weight against his chest disappears. He hasn't lost his friend. ]
You're not getting rid of me that easily. Not after all the trouble you put me through to get you to even like me in the first place.
no subject
He makes a disgruntled sort of muttering and grumbling noise under his breath at that. Okay, LOOK. Good thing Aventurine won't ever know he kissed him when he was asleep. Somnophilia kink... (no)]
If that's the case, then do your part, you giant idiot. If you can talk to anyone, it ought to be Nehan, then me. And since Nehan isn't here, you're left with me. Lucky you.
Are you still having trouble sleeping and breathing? Why did you even pick this place then!
I can't stand you.
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Can't stand me? I just thought a nice walk would do some good for the both of us. If I had known we'd be having this talk in the middle of it, I would have picked somewhere else!
[ At least it's easy to fall back into old habits with Essek. Like arguing. ]
... And my breathing is fine. It's just sleep that escapes me. I take naps here and there, but I haven't had a restful night's sleep in a while.
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He leans back and puts his hands on Aventurine's arms instead. In case he needs to shake the shit out of Aventurine probably.]
Would you stop that? Do you want to stay somewhere together so you can get some sleep? You can't think you exist when it has been almost eight weeks, and you haven't been sleeping. This is why you're insane.
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Anyway, they pull away from their hug, and Aventurine gawks at Essek. ]
I think my efforts for getting this far should be commended at least a little bit more than that. [ No, they should not. ] But I don't know. Maybe. I did see there was a motel setup.
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Alright, it's done then.
[HE DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO NEGOTIATE, HE JUST IMMEDIATELY ASSIGNED AVENTURINE IN A ROOM WITH HIM SO HE CAN SLEEP.]
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You aren't going to leave me there by myself as payback for my stunt all those weeks ago, are you?
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I'll consider whether or not I am feeling vengeful or lenient, but the method for you remains the same. If you don't show up, I will hunt you down.
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I guess there aren't that many places to hide. Fine, then. We'll see if this works.
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Shut up. It is going to work. You passed out so easily at the party on the bank.
[That was because he was drunk. Takes all the credit for himself.]
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[ THAT WAS HIS BAD ]
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[:|]
You left me alone again despite coming out to find me, then I had to go back in by myself.
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Well, did you try to wake me up?
[ Said like this is Essek's fault. ]
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Excuse me?! You're the one who told me you were wanting to rest! Then you just passed out!
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Alright, alright. I don't plan on drinking like that again, so lesson learned.