[THE LOBBY THAT HE'S SEEN SO MANY TIMES TODAY IN ALL OF HIS RUNNING AROUND FROM SO MANY CURSES AND BEES...
There's some hesitation, but Lucas will go follow him to sit. He perches like he's ready to flight or flight at a moment's notice, though. Not out of fear of Aventurine or his bees, but more because he is just an extremely guilty person that's always ready to run. There's a little flicker of surprise, then.]
—Ah, no, it's... There's no reason to apologize for it.
[HE WILL ACCEPT ANY FORM OF PENANCE including being trapped in a room with bees until a teenager has to come save him.]
Penance isn't bees, Lucas. That had just been a malicious prank!!! ]
Even so, I'm sorry. I will admit that I'm still having... some trouble wrapping my mind around what happened when you returned, but I do recognize you hadn't been yourself at the time.
[ And he's at least willing to talk about it a little more this time instead of just walking away. ]
[HELPPPP also listen it's penance when you have a phobia, all suffering is penance.
Aventurine continues to be one of the only people to have a normal reaction to that whole debacle though. The guilt's still hanging out, but there is perhaps a tiny flicker of something grateful just for exactly that - the fact that Aventurine is willing to talk.
He glances down at his hands, folded in his lap.]
...Even if I wasn't myself, it's still my fault that it happened, and my hands that caused the damage. I... apologize for forcing you to endure such a thing.
[Even though sorries always feel like a pitiful thing to offer. Like damn truly just "sorry I murdered your fragile furry bf in cold blood in front of your salad".]
There's another stretch of silence as he processes the apology, giving it the consideration it needs for the weight behind it. He knows he has a reason for reacting so strongly, seeing his family in the victims and himself in Lucas, and to cast that burden on someone who had clearly been out of his mind wears away at him. It sets upon him his own brand of guilt. ]
Thank you. [ His voice is a bit halting and strained. The emotionshare, however, is sincere. ] And I'm sorry you had to go through that.
[ It wasn't the first time for Lucas either. Aventurine remembers that time so many weeks ago, the people who had been just as angry with Lucas back when murders weren't so understood as they are now. ]
There's another little pulse of gratitude at the sincerity, though it's a bit smothered and buried away. More guilt at the latter part, since he doesn't see himself as being worthy of any softer sentiments when he's the attacker. But he'll just move along, nodding at the question.]
I have, yes. [A little bit of discomfort, because frankly he would rather people pull an Ichiban and just punch him a few times and then never speak to him again, but NO ONE HERE IS NORMAL.]
I was able to say what I could say, for what little it may be worth. And I was also able to work out a plan so that this will never happen again.
He'll ease up a bit more at the response, shoulders dropping as he nods his head. We love a contingency plan, and he regards Lucas with open curiosity instead of the former suspicion. ]
Would asking what this plan is be overstepping my boundaries?
[ Like. He doesn't want anyone to fucking MURDER Lucas or anything... ]
Anyway the way that part of the plan is indeed murder but he's such a menace even when nerfed that it's the backup plan because it would require people to get too close.]
Not at all. I'm more susceptible to chemicals than to bodily harm, so the plan is to create something that can render me unconscious and be administered from afar. That way, no one has to risk getting too close, and there won't be a range of damage if there are bystanders again, as is the case with gas.
[In that he doesn't want to TRAUMATIZE MORE PEOPLE or risk killing anyone else, my god is he tired of killing people. He also drops into a bit of silence at that. Guilt Increases, but there's a little flicker of warmth.]
...Thank you for the sentiment. I have. I think that with this group of people, it would be quite impossible not to... It's been a blessing to have the opportunity to know you all, even though the situation has been a painful struggle for every one of us in different ways.
[He was truly so busy being a pillar of catholic guilt i have to play lucas again from a route where he can just be a flirty alcoholic.]
[ HE ENTERED THIS HELLHOLE AS A BURNING CORPSE IN THE HOSPITAL. You would make him more flammable by stuffing him full of alcohol. ]
That's a relief to hear.
[ And as they start settling into this topic, Aventurine relaxes a bit more. He'd always found it easy to simply talk with Lucas, and he falls back into that habit. ]
Are you feeling nervous at all? We're getting closer to the end now.
But he can ease into conversation pretty well, too, for similar reasons. The faint cloud of Catholicism never leaves but that's just a daily Lucas thing. There's a little beat as he considers his answer.]
...Somewhat, I suppose... A great many things could go wrong, and we're not exactly a bunch known for having good fortune. But I'm relieved, as well.
[HE WANTS TO GET OUT OF HERE SO DAMN BAD.]
What about you...? How are you feeling about it all?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I'm fine. I'm one of the lucky few who managed to avoid a curse.
[ The emotionshare coming from him isn't... outright guilt, but it is a little sheepish. ]
But I'll apologize, too, about the bees.
no subject
There's some hesitation, but Lucas will go follow him to sit. He perches like he's ready to flight or flight at a moment's notice, though. Not out of fear of Aventurine or his bees, but more because he is just an extremely guilty person that's always ready to run. There's a little flicker of surprise, then.]
—Ah, no, it's... There's no reason to apologize for it.
[HE WILL ACCEPT ANY FORM OF PENANCE including being trapped in a room with bees until a teenager has to come save him.]
no subject
Penance isn't bees, Lucas. That had just been a malicious prank!!! ]
Even so, I'm sorry. I will admit that I'm still having... some trouble wrapping my mind around what happened when you returned, but I do recognize you hadn't been yourself at the time.
[ And he's at least willing to talk about it a little more this time instead of just walking away. ]
no subject
Aventurine continues to be one of the only people to have a normal reaction to that whole debacle though. The guilt's still hanging out, but there is perhaps a tiny flicker of something grateful just for exactly that - the fact that Aventurine is willing to talk.
He glances down at his hands, folded in his lap.]
...Even if I wasn't myself, it's still my fault that it happened, and my hands that caused the damage. I... apologize for forcing you to endure such a thing.
[Even though sorries always feel like a pitiful thing to offer. Like damn truly just "sorry I murdered your fragile furry bf in cold blood in front of your salad".]
no subject
There's another stretch of silence as he processes the apology, giving it the consideration it needs for the weight behind it. He knows he has a reason for reacting so strongly, seeing his family in the victims and himself in Lucas, and to cast that burden on someone who had clearly been out of his mind wears away at him. It sets upon him his own brand of guilt. ]
Thank you. [ His voice is a bit halting and strained. The emotionshare, however, is sincere. ] And I'm sorry you had to go through that.
[ It wasn't the first time for Lucas either. Aventurine remembers that time so many weeks ago, the people who had been just as angry with Lucas back when murders weren't so understood as they are now. ]
You've talked to the others, I take it?
no subject
There's another little pulse of gratitude at the sincerity, though it's a bit smothered and buried away. More guilt at the latter part, since he doesn't see himself as being worthy of any softer sentiments when he's the attacker. But he'll just move along, nodding at the question.]
I have, yes. [A little bit of discomfort, because frankly he would rather people pull an Ichiban and just punch him a few times and then never speak to him again, but NO ONE HERE IS NORMAL.]
I was able to say what I could say, for what little it may be worth. And I was also able to work out a plan so that this will never happen again.
[They're going to dart him like a polar bear.]
no subject
He'll ease up a bit more at the response, shoulders dropping as he nods his head. We love a contingency plan, and he regards Lucas with open curiosity instead of the former suspicion. ]
Would asking what this plan is be overstepping my boundaries?
[ Like. He doesn't want anyone to fucking MURDER Lucas or anything... ]
no subject
Anyway the way that part of the plan is indeed murder but he's such a menace even when nerfed that it's the backup plan because it would require people to get too close.]
Not at all. I'm more susceptible to chemicals than to bodily harm, so the plan is to create something that can render me unconscious and be administered from afar. That way, no one has to risk getting too close, and there won't be a range of damage if there are bystanders again, as is the case with gas.
[POLAR BEAR DARTS!!]
no subject
It sounds like a lot of thought was put into this. I'll wish for it to never come to use.
[ For everyone's sake, including Lucas'. ]
... You've had a difficult go of things from the beginning, but it's my hope you've had better moments in between, Lucas.
no subject
I'll hope for the same...
[In that he doesn't want to TRAUMATIZE MORE PEOPLE or risk killing anyone else, my god is he tired of killing people. He also drops into a bit of silence at that. Guilt Increases, but there's a little flicker of warmth.]
...Thank you for the sentiment. I have. I think that with this group of people, it would be quite impossible not to... It's been a blessing to have the opportunity to know you all, even though the situation has been a painful struggle for every one of us in different ways.
[He was truly so busy being a pillar of catholic guilt i have to play lucas again from a route where he can just be a flirty alcoholic.]
no subject
That's a relief to hear.
[ And as they start settling into this topic, Aventurine relaxes a bit more. He'd always found it easy to simply talk with Lucas, and he falls back into that habit. ]
Are you feeling nervous at all? We're getting closer to the end now.
no subject
But he can ease into conversation pretty well, too, for similar reasons. The faint cloud of Catholicism never leaves but that's just a daily Lucas thing. There's a little beat as he considers his answer.]
...Somewhat, I suppose... A great many things could go wrong, and we're not exactly a bunch known for having good fortune. But I'm relieved, as well.
[HE WANTS TO GET OUT OF HERE SO DAMN BAD.]
What about you...? How are you feeling about it all?
no subject
Equal parts apprehensive and confident?
[ He doesn't find a reason to lie here about his nervousness. Not when the emotionshare is on. ]
I guess you could say I'm not used to relying on others.
no subject
I suppose so... I do think that we'll be able to get through whatever is thrown our way, at least.
[He will fucking die literally and metaphorically if they don't.]
This must be a challenge for you in that case, though... I can understand it.