essek.

[tactic]

Comments

[tactic]

[ Truly the wet paper napkin of it all, but Aventurine's mental fortitude has always been in shambles, and he can barely register the hands grabbing at his arms. He feels light-headed and dizzy, but he does not pass out!!

Instead, he reaches out with a trembling hand to take hold of one of Essek's wrists, needing to stabilize himself for a moment. ]

... It's fine. It was just... a memory. [ He opens his eyes to fix his gaze on a random spot on the bathroom floor. ] He's not dead.

[unconsecuted]

[They're disintegrating exponentially. He allows Aventurine to hold onto him like a lifeline, that's fine. His other hand reaches out to cover Aventurine's own, to hold Aventurine's hand between both of his despite the fact he is also trembling from the aftershocks of the memory.]

He's not. He's safe. So are all our friends not here. So are the Mighty Nein, Caleb. They are alright. He was still okay even then, in the end.

[A frown appears.]

You have been holding this all in.

[A gentle, friendly, scolding accusation. He isn't stupid. He is doing the same thing. Has done the same thing. He can see it.]

[tactic]

[ He focuses on the reassurances, nodding along to the sound of Essek's voice, but it's impossible to keep the afterimage of Nehan's broken body from replaying over and over again in his mind. ]

You can't exactly accuse me of being an open book.

[ His troubles are his own, as they have been throughout most of his life. But he's clearly rattled in a way that he's never shown to Essek before. It's not helped by the faint ringing still left in his ears from the explosion, and he tries to even his breathing despite it all. ]

Distract me. Tell me about your friends. What would they be doing right now?

[unconsecuted]

[Idiot. Well, they are both idiots here. It's almost disheartening how strange it is to see Aventurine shaken by anything, though it does not necessarily surprise him considering the topic.

A huff escapes him. His expression is pained and wry at the same time.]

I guess they would be frozen in time until I get back.

[The joke falls a little flat really, but he says it anyway.]

It's not... really... an uplifting topic. [Two can play the "we keep our emotions in here, and then we die" game.] We. What we would be doing right now.

...We had used something we had found to give us energy as if we had been resting for a while. We were about to... potentially take on a battle that I'm really not sure if any of us will survive.

[tactic]

[ OKAY! WHEN HE ASKED FOR DISTRACTIONS, HE DIDN'T MEAN THIS.

But it does work to distract him, and Aventurine snaps his head up, tearing his gaze away from where it had fixed itself onto nothing to stare at Essek instead. ]

What are you talking about? Why in the world would you do something like that?

[ ARE ESSEK AND HIS FRIENDS STUPID? ]

[unconsecuted]

[HE SAID IT WASN'T VERY UPLIFTING. YOU ARE THE ONE WHO ASKED, YOU FUCK!! Don't just let it distract you anyway. NO. STOP WORRYING ABOUT HIM! He can't even get mad about Aventurine dumping him with questions because the distraction is working.

He shakes his head, lips thinning.]

It is... a long story. It's... for them. I'm doing it for them. This is their journey; I'm only along for the ride because... they... are my friends. They came to me for help.

[Yes, they are stupid, and they are about to fight Lucien who is going to be turned into a Broly version of a nine maged puppet with eye tentacles.]

[tactic]

[ It is working... The grip he has on Essek's wrist loosens some, the trembling having subsided for the most part, though he keeps his hand where it is. ]

... You idiot. All that fuss about making friends when we first met, and here you are willing to die for them now.

[ He'd find it funny if he wasn't coming down from a near panic attack and also if it weren't so genuinely touching. ]

You'll survive. You're too stubborn and stupid to die.

[unconsecuted]

[The lines of his face relax only because Aventurine relaxes. Okay, it's working. Good.]

I was a completely different man then. Please.

[He had only just begun the path of domestication.]

You are lucky I am feeling generous enough not to take offense to that.

[He'll bash your blonde head
in.]

As if you haven't done the same, and are probably doing the same still somewhere as we speak. [Idiot.] ...You really weren't going to tell me, were you?

I thought you were the one who insisted we become friends.

[tactic]

[ A HEAVY SIGH as he tries to return to normalcy. He should probably get up from the bathroom floor, but he doesn't trust his knees not to buckle and the last thing he needs is for Essek to see that again. So... sitting on the floor together it is. ]

What's there to tell?

[ Other than he's an anxious mess of a human being. ]

I don't think any of us are happy to be doing this again, and we're all a bit worried, aren't we?

[unconsecuted]

[They should probably get off the bathroom floor. Essek will help them up, but right now, they are just sitting together on this floor like morons.]

A lot.

[You aren't the only anxious mess, you bastard.]

I don't know, I don't think half the people here are worried enough because they are too confident in our collective ability to win. So that leaves me and you.

[tactic]

[ Well, at least this feels easy... ]

Don't say it like that... If we start spiraling about an impending doom, we'll never stop.

[ Not the fucking bathroom angst. ]

[unconsecuted]

[THE BATHROOM ANGST.]

Not acknowledging the possibility of impending doom is just stupid. Then we get some sheet of - [a restrained pause, for a second] - fucking paper we don't know where from which amounts to us being entertainment, and now we don't know what to believe.

Maybe Jonas is right, this is divine punishment and why I hate gods.

[Goodbye, he has already started spiraling.]

[tactic]

[ Excuse him as he starts for a moment because it's like hearing a saint curse.

But okay, he's going to finally let go of Essek so he can have both hands to rub at his temples. ]

Entertainment... As long as there's no horrible beast at the end of this that we have to fight. Entertainment is simple. You keep the audience's attention, you feed them the crap they want to hear, and they're far easier to kill than a monster.

[unconsecuted]

[A SAINT.]

You, of all people, are going to tell me this? People are more terrifying than any beast, Aventurine. People with goals they are willing to reach no matter the cost. I know that better than anyone.

I am not particularly interested in fighting, but I would take a beast over... over a person, a person with a a single relentless goal, especially one delving into powerful, terrible magic.

[Seems a little personal.]

[tactic]

You're right not to underestimate people, but they are only people at the end of it all.

[ The tone he uses to say 'people' is so derogatory... ]

Don't get me wrong, I'm just as concerned as you are, but we shouldn't be frightening ourselves. The last thing we need is to feed each other's fears.

[unconsecuted]

[This makes him frown, and it looks like he wants to argue, but he drops it with a sharp exhale of relent.]

You started this.

[No one started this, but anyway. He's blaming Aventurine because Aventurine is here and ripe to be blamed. Irritably - not at Aventurine, though, at the situation - he starts getting up. He doesn't even ask Aventurine, but instead grabs Aventurine's hand and starts hauling the two of them up together.]

[tactic]

[ ALL THEY DO IS ARGUE.

But all that arguing has at least managed to calm Aventurine down, and he takes Essek's hand to be helped up. Fortunately, he remains standing, and in an effort to break whatever tension might be left in the air, goes ahead and asks, ]

Why are you in my bathroom anyway?

[unconsecuted]

[It is the nature of two men (Boothill) with their token gay twink friend. They all always do nothing but argue.

He gives Aventurine a look.]

What are you talking about? This is my bathroom.

[tactic]

No, it isn't. I was just in my room a moment ago, see?

[ Turns around and points to...

Wait a minute, that's not his room through the open bathroom door. ]

[unconsecuted]

No, you're stealing someone else's bathroom is what you're doing.

[Peering around Aventurine to look at the room. SEE. YOU ARE A THIEF.

He glances back from the direction he came with a frown. Why would Aventurine just be walking up inside of his bathroom, though?]

[tactic]

[ WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS ROOM? ]

Don't tell me I'm going to walk into your bathroom every time I try and walk into mine.

[ That's such a horrible room layout?? also can you give me a Caleb mem :pleading: but make it soemthing gay ]

[unconsecuted]

[the way you demand this but haven't even given me one. pauses my tagging to do this for you.]

It's not like I want you walking into my bathroom when you're trying to walk into yours!

[Have a gay Caleb mem even though Aventurine tried so hard to set him up with Wriothesley. (It's TTRPG, but if you would like to watch it at all, here you go. It goes on until about 4:01:00 but you can watch a tad after for more Essek gets verbally beat up by friends.)]

[tactic]

[ STARTS CRYING UNCONTROLLABLY me not aventurine. Aventurine just turns back around to stare at Essek with wide eyes, and then he's suddenly frowning. Except that frown lasts all of two seconds before he breaks out into a stupid grin. ]

Wooow... Essek, to think that you had so many friends who genuinely care about you. Aren't you a popular guy?

[unconsecuted]

[He stands there like a fucking statue, frozen, NOT UNLIKE WHEN HE HAD BEEN PARALYZED, hands balled into fists and expression shocked. Imagine having to live your most embarrassing and soft moments for a second TIME. A third! A fourth!

His expression sours slightly, but not with any real heat.]

Stop that.

[tactic]

[ The way Aventurine is like, emotionally touched but also this is suuuuuch good material to tease Essek with. He is thriving. ]

That Caleb guy seems awfully close to you.