[ Oh, no. Aventurine feels his heart drop to his stomach, and he fumbles with the scarf around his neck to pull it off and hand it to Essek. ]
Here, if you need to cry, cry into this. I don't even like it that much.
[ Time for his exceptional comforting skills to kick into gear, except that he doesn't have any, so he's left trying to come up with something to say. ]
... It's not you, Essek. Take a look around at all these clowns, myself included. You just... found yourself surrounded with a bunch of flighty flirts.
[Damn, he's not even drunk! Maybe he should have just chilled out instead of dropped into the party. Not that this hasn't been on his mind since before the party. Sometimes! A PARTY MAKES IT WORSE! Why is he acting like a teenager?! Now he's embarrassed on top of everything.
He reaches up to push Aventurine's arm away gently. Pretends he does not have glassy eyes.]
People have their own... goals after this. I understand. I do, too. I guess I'm just... I don't know why I bothered trying at all. I should have left things alone.
[ Okay, well, he will leave this scarf on the blanket in case it's needed.
He's quiet as he listens, and he feels awful seeing Essek like this. After a moment of silence, Aventurine shifts around so that he's also lying on the blanket, his gaze turned toward the sky. This feels familiar. ]
He does not say anything for a long time. His hands come to rest on his chest again, but not laced. His eyes are searching the sky, and he at least doesn't look like he might cry anymore.]
Yeah.
[Again, he's quiet for a stretch of time. There isn't any point in acting like a toddler, he feels, and then not explaining to Aventurine, of all people.]
Wriothesley isn't looking for anything serious. He said he was... interested, but it would only be casual. That's fine. I understand. [Another pause.] Childe and I... talked. He kissed me again first actually and said he wanted me to know he would without being cursed.
But when I asked what he was looking for, he told me nothing. He is dead and so he can't give me the time. I get that, too. I have my own problems at home.
[ Now he's like maybe we shouldn't go back to the living because what the fuck is going to happen with Anders. But also, he's sympathetic, he's just not great at showing it... ]
Alright, so... Mr. Wriothesley can't commit, and Childe is dead. How are either of these things your fault?
[DON'T JUST TALK LIKE HE'S A WHORE. HE ISN'T EVEN THE ONE DOING THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's one toe ring away from becoming evil again and exploding not only Australia but this whole fucking group of people.
Anyway.]
I shouldn't have bothered trying is all. This why - this is why, Aventurine, it takes so much longer for me with these things.
[ It's getting late, and the stars are out. He watches them as he mulls over what to say next. ]
When it happened for me, it started out as a casual thing too, you know? It's not like either of us were looking for a relationship. [ Turns his head in the direction of the party. ] It's not your fault for trying. The fact of the matter is that a lot of the people here are just struggling in their own ways.
[He will be. He just lies there with Aventurine, waiting for the dirt to claim him from under the blanket.]
I know.
[Which is why he's embarrassed about how he's acting and the way he is struggling to feel. He has food at home!! What the fuck is even the problem! Getting to know other people sucks, he's realized.]
[ STOP LITERALLY EVERYONE AVENTURINE HAS EVER CARED ABOUT HAS DIED ON HIM DO NOT BRING BACK THIS TRAUMA
But wow, this makes him think about if he had been too drunk to notice and then he would have left Essek all by himself out here and Aventurine would have been a horrible friend.
Anyway, reaches over to smack him on the shoulder.]
Quit apologizing. I needed to get away from the party anyway. You should have dragged me away with you.
[Yeah, that could have been a timeline that could have happened. That timeline happened in some reality somewhere actually. Essek was left alone for the rest of the night.
He grunts and jabs Aventurine with an elbow in return.]
Why? You don't have any reason to want to get away from a party.
[You stupid, idiot. He takes a hold of the hand by the wrist, then turns over on his side so he's facing Aventurine, holding the hand against his chest.]
You didn't answer my question.
[He's stupid, but he's not stupid, okay.]
I'll stay here with you until you feel like going back.
[ AND HE WILL CONTINUE TO NOT ANSWER THE QUESTION as he closes his eyes and starts drifting off to tipsy sleep. ]
... Just come and wake me up if the party dies down and I'm still not there. I won't forgive you if you forget and make me spend the entire night here...
[ The more he talks, the more it becomes sleepy mumbles. Good night, Essek. ]
[WTF! DON'T JUST COME OUT HERE TO GET FED AND THEN NOT GIVE ANYTHING IN RETURN!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
Hey, you didn't answer my...! Question...
[What the fuck? He is staring at Aventurine despondently. He's been abandoned out here, alone? THE TIMELINE REALLY CAME TRUE ANYWAY! HE HAS BEEN FORSAKEN OUT HERE ALONE!]
...That's not how friendship works.
[A quiet sigh. He glances down, and then turns his head a bit to look up at the sky instead. No one loves him, not even his friend......]
He will stay out here for a while longer just because he worries about Aventurine rolling off into the fucking water in his stupor sleep, but eventually, he'll sit up.
For a long moment, he peers down at Aventurine. He doesn't think this man is alright at all. In fact, he knows it.
Anyway, he will suddenly just lean down and kiss Aventurine lightly on the lips, and then he gets up to go back to the party.]
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Here, if you need to cry, cry into this. I don't even like it that much.
[ Time for his exceptional comforting skills to kick into gear, except that he doesn't have any, so he's left trying to come up with something to say. ]
... It's not you, Essek. Take a look around at all these clowns, myself included. You just... found yourself surrounded with a bunch of flighty flirts.
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He reaches up to push Aventurine's arm away gently. Pretends he does not have glassy eyes.]
People have their own... goals after this. I understand. I do, too. I guess I'm just... I don't know why I bothered trying at all. I should have left things alone.
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He's quiet as he listens, and he feels awful seeing Essek like this. After a moment of silence, Aventurine shifts around so that he's also lying on the blanket, his gaze turned toward the sky. This feels familiar. ]
Did something else happen recently?
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He does not say anything for a long time. His hands come to rest on his chest again, but not laced. His eyes are searching the sky, and he at least doesn't look like he might cry anymore.]
Yeah.
[Again, he's quiet for a stretch of time. There isn't any point in acting like a toddler, he feels, and then not explaining to Aventurine, of all people.]
Wriothesley isn't looking for anything serious. He said he was... interested, but it would only be casual. That's fine. I understand. [Another pause.] Childe and I... talked. He kissed me again first actually and said he wanted me to know he would without being cursed.
But when I asked what he was looking for, he told me nothing. He is dead and so he can't give me the time. I get that, too. I have my own problems at home.
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[ Now he's like maybe we shouldn't go back to the living because what the fuck is going to happen with Anders. But also, he's sympathetic, he's just not great at showing it... ]
Alright, so... Mr. Wriothesley can't commit, and Childe is dead. How are either of these things your fault?
no subject
Say it any other way.
[DON'T JUST TALK LIKE HE'S A WHORE. HE ISN'T EVEN THE ONE DOING THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's one toe ring away from becoming evil again and exploding not only Australia but this whole fucking group of people.
Anyway.]
I shouldn't have bothered trying is all. This why - this is why, Aventurine, it takes so much longer for me with these things.
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[ It's getting late, and the stars are out. He watches them as he mulls over what to say next. ]
When it happened for me, it started out as a casual thing too, you know? It's not like either of us were looking for a relationship. [ Turns his head in the direction of the party. ] It's not your fault for trying. The fact of the matter is that a lot of the people here are just struggling in their own ways.
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I know.
[Which is why he's embarrassed about how he's acting and the way he is struggling to feel. He has food at home!! What the fuck is even the problem! Getting to know other people sucks, he's realized.]
It's fine. I'll be fine after a while.
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[ Yeah, they can just stay here for a little while longer. ]
Don't go wandering off on your own again. You should also know that I'm here whenever you want to talk.
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I already knew you would find me if you realized I was missing and weren't too drunk to noticed.
[Because Aventurine is his friend.]
I'm sorry... for acting this way right now, of all times.
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But wow, this makes him think about if he had been too drunk to notice and then he would have left Essek all by himself out here and Aventurine would have been a horrible friend.
Anyway, reaches over to smack him on the shoulder.]
Quit apologizing. I needed to get away from the party anyway. You should have dragged me away with you.
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He grunts and jabs Aventurine with an elbow in return.]
Why? You don't have any reason to want to get away from a party.
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Anyway, just enjoys the cool breeze and the fresh air for a moment. He's still a little tipsy. ]
I was drinking more than usual. It caught up to me, how close we are to finishing all of this.
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Do you want some water? Are you... nervous, or just... relieved?
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Jae-ha got me some water earlier. I'll be okay, I just want to stay here for a while, maybe nap it off. Go back to the party.
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You didn't answer my question.
[He's stupid, but he's not stupid, okay.]
I'll stay here with you until you feel like going back.
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... Just come and wake me up if the party dies down and I'm still not there. I won't forgive you if you forget and make me spend the entire night here...
[ The more he talks, the more it becomes sleepy mumbles. Good night, Essek. ]
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Hey, you didn't answer my...! Question...
[What the fuck? He is staring at Aventurine despondently. He's been abandoned out here, alone? THE TIMELINE REALLY CAME TRUE ANYWAY! HE HAS BEEN FORSAKEN OUT HERE ALONE!]
...That's not how friendship works.
[A quiet sigh. He glances down, and then turns his head a bit to look up at the sky instead. No one loves him, not even his friend......]
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He will stay out here for a while longer just because he worries about Aventurine rolling off into the fucking water in his stupor sleep, but eventually, he'll sit up.
For a long moment, he peers down at Aventurine. He doesn't think this man is alright at all. In fact, he knows it.
Anyway, he will suddenly just lean down and kiss Aventurine lightly on the lips, and then he gets up to go back to the party.]